Fall Guys Review – Move Over Fortnite

This article originally ran under a different banner/website in August of 2020 and is now being here re-uploaded for purposes of convenience and consolidation. Please enjoy.

HEAR YE!!!  HEAR YE!!! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!  I, THE VIDEO GAME DOOMSAYER, HAVE FINALLY DONE IT!!!  I have searched the highest of snow-capped mountains.  I have scoured the alleys of every major city across the globe.  I have ventured into the deep of treacherous jungles.  I have gone to the darkest corners of the world, looking for a battle royale game that I could enjoy.  I have finally found it.  It is not Fortnite, PUBG, or Apex Legends.  Nay, the battle royale game that I have enjoyed the most is none other than Fall Guys.

If you have ever witnessed shows like Wipeout or Takeshi’s Castle, then you already have a strong base for what Fall Guys is.  You are a little jelly bean character trying to survive Wipeout-like challenges until one is the ultimate winner.  Each round, a certain number of players can be eliminated either by failing to complete the challenges or falling off the map.  With an almost perfect hit-detection system, you will frequently be bounced around levels like Schum in a ruby game.  As you’re bounced around, your little jellybean character makes a comical oh’ing noise that helps carry the comedic tone of the game.  Matches will frequently devolve into chaotic messes that will cause a smile to worm onto your face.

There are a variety of levels within Fall Guys.  My personal favorite has to be the races.  In a traditional Wipeout-style, you will have to race the other contestants across a wacky obstacle course.  Frequently, these races are used to whittle down the player count from sixty to about forty players.  Most of these obstacle courses will have a theme like Dizzy Height containing fans and spinning levers that knock you off platforms to See-Saw which is a course containing nothing but see-saws.  These courses always become a hectic mess as a mass of jellybeans tries and usually fails to avoid obstacles.  The See-Saw race can be a little frustrating as players congregate on one end of the see-saw, making it impossible to walk across without falling off.  However, it all culminates in an almost Three Stooges-like comedy of errors, that I can never be mad at.

Contestants have their ups and downs in a boss-employee edition of ABC’s Wipeout, airing July 10 at 9 p.m. WIPEOUT – “Boss and Employee 2012” – “Wipeout” – The Boss and Employee special returns for more team building exercises when partners made up of employees and their actual bosses learn that getting to the top is no simple task as they attempt to climb The Corporate Ladder together, followed by a confidence shattering lesson on The Pound About before a challenging water cooler conversation with Bigfoot in the petrified forest. Contestants including “The Cool Coaches,” “The Trojan Men” and “The Pranking Pastors” will work together all day, but go at it alone in the Wipeout Zone for a chance to bring home a $50,000 pay day. Hosted by John Anderson (ESPN’s “SportsCenter”), John Henson (E! Entertainment’s “Talk Soup”) and co-hosted by Vanessa Lachey (ABC’s True Beauty), this episode of “Wipeout” airs TUESDAY, JULY 10 (8:00-9:00 p.m., ET) on ABC. (ABC/MIKE WEAVER)

Another common style of games consists of team-based games.  You will be assigned a specific color and must work with your team to complete a goal.  From egg collecting to goal scoring to hoop-jumping; you must work with your team to ensure your team doesn’t have the lowest amounts of points leading to your elimination.  Mayhem quickly ensues, as some teammates will work diligently towards the goal, and other players will work to actively prevent another team from winning.  Much like the races, I can’t be mad when I am eliminated due to my teammates not pulling their weight, because I am usually tearing up in laughter at how absurd it is watching these jelly beans push soccer balls around.  

A final game style is a tag system.  Players will be given tails and players without tails will have to try to grab them.  Sometimes you are sorted in teams and the team with the least amount of tails will be eliminated.  Other times, one player will have a tail and the player with the tail at the end of the round will be the winner.  While there is a button to grab things such as ledges and players, you have to be directly behind a player to grab the tail from them.  As you can imagine, grabbing the tail feels finicky in the cartoonish dust cloud that matches devolve into.  Personally, I wouldn’t mind if these tail games were cut for more races.

Now, we must address the giant elephant in the room that resembles computer servers: online connectivity.  Fall Guys being a battle royale means the entire game is online-only, meaning if the servers go down, you just watched your twenty dollars go up in smoke.  Unfortunately, it seems the developers at Mediatonic were severely underestimating how many people would want to take part in the madness.  Even after making ritualistic sacrifices to the Devolver Digital Gods, I still found it difficult to get into matches during the opening weekend.  I know the small team at Mediatonic is working on it, I must comment on it since there is no offline mode.  It might not be the team’s top priority, but I think an offline mode against bots, could stem the tide of outrage that comes from the servers going down.  

While I am also making suggestions to Mediatonic, can you please just sell a costume as one complete package rather than two separate pieces?  The Fortnite-style store is pretty egregious, you don’t need to double-dip on charging us for skins; especially, when seeing a sea of jellybeans with various costumes is part of the whimsical nature of Fall Guys.

MY LOYAL FOLLOWERS!!!  Even through my constant nitpicking, I keep coming back to the central theme behind Fall Guys: the playful nature of this game helps me endure any pain the game may cause.  Yes, Fall Guys must not be as strategic or action-packed as some other battle royales.  It might have some connection issues and lack any offline modes.  However, as soon as the first race begins, I am powerless against the smile seeping onto my face.  Games like Mario Party and Fall Guys are becoming fewer as the medium claims to be maturing.  However, I will take millions of failed attempts to grab the crown in Fall Guys, then play any of the bland factory-produced battle royale games that the video game industry will insist are fun.  YOU DO NOT KNOW FUN, ACTIVISION, EA, AND UBISOFT!!!  Again, Devolver Digital and the developers under their watch, have done you’re better than you.

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